Wednesday, January 5, 2022

A Procrastinating Writer's Letter to Santa

Hi Santa --

How are you? How are things at the North Pole?

I want to apologize for reaching out to you during your well-deserved vacation time. Unfortunately, since I've practically perfected the art of procrastination, I didn't get around to this letter until now.

Okay, since you see me when I'm sleeping, and know when I'm awake, you know that's only partly true. Yes, I put this off but I also didn't think of it until it was too late to contact you in a timely fashion. It seems that even my ideas show up late.

Anyway, back to my point. I had a great Christmas, despite the fact that I never got around to writing to you last year. But, as I approach 2022, I can think of a few things I'd love to have.

  1. Confidence. I’ve got plenty of this at the idea stage but, it seems that when I sit down to see those ideas through, I freeze up and that ubiquitous procrastination kicks in. If you could have your elves come up with something that sits on my desk and pops up now and then when I'm writing to tell me to have a little faith, that'd be great.
  1. An inbox reset. I've accepted the fact that I will never be at inbox zero on my own, and I'm okay with that. But, if you could magically thin out the junk mail and unsubscribe to the stuff I shouldn't have subscribed to in the first place, that would make my life a lot easier. How does that connect to writing? Less time spent on that infernal inbox means more time available to write.
  1. Super submission powers. I don't mind submitting, but if you could point me in the direction of the people who actually want to read the 30 page proposal I've labored over and/or those who will at least respond when I send them something, that'd be great. Again, it would save me a lot of time and would go a long way toward increasing the first item on this list.
  1. The desire to revise. We don't need to go overboard here. I don't need the same level of excitement for revision as I feel when a new idea grabs me (although, come to think of it, that’d be great), but if your elves could just come up with something that helps me dread it less, that would be fantastic.
  1. The motivation to write at any time of day. I know this one's a big ask, especially since there are times of day when I really do have this. Unfortunately, other responsibilities (like a day job) are often scheduled for that same time, so by the time I finish with those, I'm content to curl up on the sofa and play Words with Friends or watch Netflix. Again, just a little spark would be terrific.

I know you're busy, Santa -- even in the off-season (I'm an educator. I get it). I'm not in a big hurry for any of this except, perhaps, the motivation. And maybe the confidence. And I don't want your work on this to take anything away from the kids, but maybe a few of them could use some of these, too, so it wouldn't be a total waste of the elves' time.

Thanks, Santa. I'll be here watching out, not crying and trying not to pout, even when I'm revising, whenever you get to this. I hope you and Mrs. Claus and the family are doing well.

Sincerely and hopefully yours,



  1. What a great list! I hope you get all you ask for!

  2. Thank you, Gloria! Let me know if you want me to put in a good word with the elves ;-)