A Writer's Life

Conger Design via Pixabay

Writing a book is hard. So many pages to fill. So much pressure, both external and self-imposed. In fiction, sometimes the characters don't cooperate (although sometimes that's fun). In non-fiction, sometimes the ideas don't come (which is less fun).

Other thoughts, however, are often in full swing. That was terrible. You can't write that. No one wants to read this. What makes you think you can write this book? You really didn't think this through, did you? You think that is good? 

Ah, yes. Self-doubt. It's enough to send us running to wash the dishes, rearrange the furniture, clean the basement. Anything sounds better than staying put and facing a blank screen that just stares back, or worse yet, somehow manages to berate and belittle.

One part of the writing process that is completely wonderful, however, is the idea stage. In the idea stage, anything is possible. "I don't know" is an acceptable response, as are things like "I haven't quite worked that out yet" and "That part is still tentative." Timelines, synopses detailed chapter outlines and logical flow are banned. The more far-fetched and creative the notion, the better.

The idea stage is non-threatening, innocuous. There's no judgment or fear, there are no wrong answers or bad ideas. It's a wonderful, relaxing, exhilarating place to be.

Unfortunately, it, like summer vacation, is fleeting.

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Eventually, the idea stage must yield to the writing-a-book stage. There, nose-to-the-grindstone and butt-in-chair meet self-doubt, generating a healthy sprinkling of procrastination.

It's the job we hate to love. Or love to hate. Either way, it's the one we can't imagine not doing and so the line between the real world and the one we put on paper blurs, each inspiring the other in unpredictable ways. Guilt nudges relaxation out of the way and drags effort, kicking and screaming, to its feet, with no regard for time of day, month or year.

It's lovely to imagine writers typing away at Starbucks, writing away in notebooks, dreaming up stories. It's even lovelier to imagine that all of those words make perfect sense and weave seamless stories immediately upon contact with the page.

But that would be fiction.

The truth is, some days, writing is a job with the same ups and downs and joys and sorrow of any other job (minus the paid vacations and health insurance).

But during the idea stage and on those days when the words flow, it has benefits of its own. They may be less practical than health insurance, but they offer a sustenance all their own.

Alexa's Fotos via Pixabay