Falling Over

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There is a yoga ball in my office. And only when I turned to it one afternoon last week and tried to balance some paperwork on top of it did I realize the irony of its presence.

The past week has been all about balance. Balancing my writing (as I near the end of the first draft of my work-in-progress) with planning for classes (which start this week). Balancing my work time (see the previous sentence) with my family time and, perhaps if I'm lucky, a little leisure time as well.

I thought I had it down. Then my mom fell and shattered her shoulder. My daughter got sick. Life intervened and the time I thought I'd have available to balance everything shrank...and then shrank some more. And the scales tipped, and my balance foundered.

By the end of the week, things were looking up. My daughter felt better. My mother came through her surgery and began the healing process. Less overwhelmed with concern for the big things, I began checking the small things -- which, a short time ago, had felt like big things -- off my list.

Balance is elusive -- here one minute and gone the next. Daily, we navigate missteps that cause us to falter -- a change in the weather, a change in plans, a change in schedule. Other times, the big things  -- an illness, a loss, a life-changing event -- cause us to lose our balance completely. Just as logic fails to chase away stress, mere wishes and intentions aren't enough to restore balance. Often, in fact, the harder we try, the more likely we are to topple over from the effort.

Which brings me back to the yoga ball. Why, you might ask, is there a yoga ball in my tiny, overstuffed office? Well, I thought it might make a good desk chair.

As it turns out, it makes an even better metaphor.